Nonfiction · Prose

Brightly Burning

For the tenth time today, I checked my outfit in the mirror. It just doesn’t look right – does my top need another pressing, or do my shoes go well with my jeans? I go through this dilemma before going to school. Every. Single. Day.

And that’s just the littlest of my worries. You most definitely don’t want to go through my thoughts when I’m flying 30,000 ft above ground, and when I’m answering a “life or death” exam on a finals week. You might brand me crazy and I’ll probably agree with you anyway.

But where do all these overthinking get me? NOWHERE.

Most often than not when it comes to big decisions, it just triggers anxiety attacks – severe headache, heart palpitating, hard time breathing. And yet with all the mental and physical stress, I wasn’t able to change anything – a dark cloud of paranoia still gloom over my head. You might think that I have overcome this by now as I’m writing? Well, I haven’t, thoroughly.

But what I learned after all these episodes of overthinking and anxiety attacks is that though things are and never will be always in my control,Β they unfold in unimaginable ways possible that makes me forget why I worried in the first place. Not everything goes as plan, but eventually they all turn out okay, scratch that, it all turns out great. Every time I look back, I’m in a much better place than I was before. I may be a small dotΒ (probably smaller than the littlest visible pixel in your screen) in the universe, but I know that the Author of my path is bigger than all the galaxies out there combined. Just as the stars shine brightly and burn out in their luster, I know that’s the way I’ll go through life – burn out, not rust out.

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34 thoughts on “Brightly Burning

  1. Great article. Worrying does indeed get you nowhere, except in more trouble. The energy we waste worrying might as well be used in solving the problem. Atleast that will get us somehwhere (out of the mess, probably)

    Like

  2. I too suffer from anxiety. I sometimes have that horrible feeling that tomorrow is going to be terrible.

    I discovered that writing takes a lot of the anxiety. That feeling when you created something, that you made a mark in the world, is cathartic.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. As an over-thinker myself, I can relate to this. Thanks for the reminder. Expectations seem to be at the root of my anxiety as well. When I release expectations and focus on what I can control (my actions, not others reactions), I am able to calm myself down and appreciate the unknown.

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  4. You know, I was thinking about the exact same thing after watching a documentary about the higgs boson. I spent the night lying in bed, thinking of whether the universe is infinite or not. Either way, I just cannot grasp it in my head. Then I realized why this isn’t something most people think of everyday. Haha.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This is just what i needed to read, it came at the right time. I have been overthinking so many things in my life lately and the stress headaches that have come with it are not pretty. But there is nothing as encouraging than nothing that it will all work out for the best in the end.
    Thank you for sharing πŸ™‚
    I saw your link on Opinionated Man’s Meet & Greet and I am so glad I followed your link.
    Have a lovely day ahead.

    Liked by 1 person

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